The Aspiring Author

I've been upping my writing work recently, on two fronts. First off, I have sent off query letters for my recent science fiction novel, Override, to literary agents. If any of them have their interest piqued, they will ask for a full manuscript, which would be fantastic. I sent off such query letters for my first two novels, The Second Shadow and Queen of Men, never getting a request for a manuscript. In theory, my writing is getting better, and so my chances keep going up. So we shall see. :)

I am now working on my fourth book, a young adult fantasy novel tentatively titled Praeteran.  This is actually related to my first novel, The Second Shadow.  I have outlined a five book series titled The Anarchist Chronicles, with Praeteran being book one and The Second Shadow being book three.  If I manage to write the whole series, I would rewrite that book three.  I am doing something a little different this time around.  Override was the first book I wrote in the first person point of view, and I am continuing that strategy with Praeteran (and likely with the rest of the series).  I am hoping to hit 90,000 words with this book, which would make it the longest I've written.  I'm presently at 12,118 words and moving forward.

Override

I have posted a couple times before about my current writing project, a more science-fiction based story currently titled Override.  I have hit somewhat of a lull in my writing, but I hope to be past that soon.  It is being written in first person, uses a good dose of sarcasm, and is (hopefully) more of a character driven book.  So we shall see.  However, I wanted to post an excerpt from the first chapter to show the kind of story it will be, and to get any first reactions to it.  So if the writing seems terrible, just let me know, and then maybe I'll stick to the normal fantasy writing I've done before. :)


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Life is good.  And by good, I don’t mean that it holds a high quality, or that it is naturally benevolent.  I mean it is skilled.  Skilled at reminding me just how much my life sucks.

What do you do when you’ve royally screwed over everything you’ve ever done?  Your life up to the present point has been an impressive assortment of tremendous miscalculations.  It’s nearly as though every choice you’ve ever made has been incorrect, from the shirts and pants you throw on each morning, to the woman you’ve selected as your lifelong mate.  Each morning, you wake up and prepare yourself for the job you should never have accepted, in the career field you don’t understand or excel at.  You’re surrounded by evidence of the truth that haunts your every waking moment: your life, at this very moment, is precisely the opposite of all you had hoped it would be, and completely reversed from everything it should be.

This sounds like the start of a self-help book.  But it’s not.  This is my scourging life.

Not that these exact examples have anything to do with me.  Seriously.  I just tried to come up with relatable things, things that normal people might have felt disappointment with.  The mistakes I’ve made are really not anything like this.  They’re much, much worse.

So, I’ll ask you again.  Actually, no, wait.  What in God’s green but now black and brown Earth am I talking about?  This is just inner monologue.  If I start to get responses, then I’ve obviously gone farther off the dock than I thought.  It’s a defense mechanism, as I’ve heard from a million different court-appointed counselors.  I also tend to daydream, moving my attention away from things in reality that I don’t really want to deal with.  And that’s what is happening now.  If you, nonexistent voyeur upon my thoughts, could see what was happening in front of my eyes at this very moment, you would want to escape from it too.  I only hope the sight is gone before I wake up.  It’s really rather frightening, though I have to admit, I have no idea why it’s happening.  I seem to be blocking out the last few moments.  Some part of my defense mechanism, I’m sure, or selective amnesia or some other psychological jargon that I wish I didn’t remember.  Well, whatever happened to bring me here, it appears to be really rather frightening.  I guess I already said that.  I pray that my bladder can restrain all of its contents.  I’ve heard of people having their life flash before their eyes in a moment of extreme panic, and I suppose that’s what this is.  Oh, good, cause all those wretched counselors haven’t made me rehash these events enough.

Anywho, this is my story, one that should never be told, since it never should have happened.  I am not who I should have been, or who anyone should have been.  I did not become what I was purposed for.  No, I’m not looking for pity, so wipe that sympathetic frown off your fictional face, cause I’m sure you haven’t hit the bull’s eye with every one of your choices.  But I’ve never hit it.  When you see all those marks on the wall, not even hitting the target, think of me.  Cause that’s where all my shots have hit in life.

What can I say?  I’ve been rather efficient at stupidity.

Or so I’ve been told.

It all started on the eighth of June, in the year 2182, in a run-down motel northeast of Saint Paul, Minnesota.  No, I admit that it doesn’t sound like the most exciting place to start a thrilling story, but what do you think this is, science fiction?  This is still just my life.  Anywho, it was the Happy River Motel, I believe.  A lovely little spot overlooking the Saint Croix River, except for all the roaches and the smell of death.  I don’t really remember that day, for I didn’t even start it alive, yet it is a day that will ever be important to me.  You see, it was the day I was conceived.  I know the date because it was carved on my father’s tombstone.

Jobs, iPhones, and Novels

Did you know that my life is, in general, not all that interesting?  Yes, it's true.  I know it's shocking.  Thus, nearly five months between blog posts.  I might end up doing something in the near future, where I use an online random blog topic generator to come up with ideas for posts.  (I am, of course, always accepting questions for Ask Cooper Anything, for this blog or for Don't Feed the Hypocrite.)

Here is a quick recap, however, of a couple of the interesting less boring things from the last few months.  First, in July, I transitioned from contract worker to full time employee at Rust Consulting in Minneapolis, doing database programming.  It's nice not to wonder whether my contract will be extended every few months.  I also finally joined the twenty-first century, trading in my old dumbphone for an iPhone 5S, and I've been quite happy with it.  It's nice to do all the smartphone related things, but especially nice to have a GPS device, and once again to be able to read my Kindle books on the bus.

In writing news, earlier this year I started work on a science fiction-esque book, presently titled Override.  It's quite different than anything else I've written, and allows me to write from a first-person point of view, and lets me write quite sarcastically.  I also set out to write a different book for NaNoWriMo, which challenges you to write a 50,000 word novel during the month of November.  While I am not going to come anywhere close to that goal, I do have a decent start on that story, which also has some science fiction elements and is presently titled Sensur.

I've been having an interesting thought run through my head concerning these two stories: with a little tweaking, they could become compatible.  So now I'm considering combining those two stories into one, which may end up as a book with dual timelines, where everything comes together nicely (in theory) at the end.  I'm still considering whether or not to do this, but I like the idea of it, I just need to work through some things and determine whether it makes sense to do it that way.  That would certainly be unlike anything else I've ever written.

So we'll see.

Ask Cooper Anything 5: Where to Live

"If you could live anywhere, where would it be and why? Assume for the purposes of this question that the people you want to live close to would also be there, and that you would be able to find a job."
- Erik C.

To come up with this answer, I had to start be eliminating the places I wouldn't live, coming at this from a practical point of view.

For starters, and this may seem incredibly lame to some people, I'm going to go ahead and disqualify a massive percentage of the world.  I actually wouldn't really have any desire to live outside of this country.  There are places around the world I think would be neat to visit (New Zealand, England, Egypt), but this country is my home and I don't ever see myself living away from it.

Next, however much I love the ocean, I don't want to live next to it.  Especially in Florida, or any place where hurricanes are a real possibility.  That's just something I would never want to deal with.  While places like California eliminate themselves due to the ocean, I also wouldn't want to live anywhere that has a good chance for earthquakes.

I don't want to be too far south, as I'm not a fan of scorching heat, and I really do enjoy being able to experience all four seasons.  Geographically, Alaska is my favorite state, because of the mountains and the ocean.  I'd be more likely to live near the ocean in Alaska than in Florida, but the high temperature in southern Alaska is maybe 60 degrees Fahrenheit in the summer, so the window for enjoying the outside during that time is fairly small, and I want to be able to play softball and do other such outdoor activities for a good amount of the year.  So no to Alaska.

Oddly enough, my current state of Minnesota fits everything pretty well so far.  The one thing that it is missing is my favorite geographical feature: mountains.  So, I would probably choose somewhere with a similar climate to Minnesota, but more mountainous.  This puts me a little farther west or southwest, ending up in western Montana, or perhaps somewhere in Idaho, Utah, Wyoming, or Colorado.  I do like having access to the big city, and yet I'd be just as happy being in the middle of nowhere, though preferably with some kind of city within reasonable driving distance.  I'd love a large amount of (low maintenance) land, where I can't see any neighbors.  As long as I can have access to high speed Internet.

I'd probably end up picking somewhere in western Montana.  That probably is quite a pathetic answer to some people, but it seems pretty nice to me.

Ask Cooper Anything 3: Color and Sadness

"Well Erik and Tim asked complicated questions. So I'll ask - what is your favorite color?  and what makes you sad? You are always happy."
- Gina C.

My favorite color is green.  Specifically, forest green - a nice dark color.  After we recently had water coming in through the egress window in my office in the basement, the wall needed to be repainted.  I could have painted the whole office, but instead I opted to paint just that one wall.  So now my office has a dark green accent wall.  Which is pretty neat.

I do sometimes consider switching my favorite color to black.  It's an exceptionally close second.  Green has held on thus far to retain the crown.  The color I would choose for different things depends on the circumstance, though.  For instance, I think black, dark grey, or silver cars look the best.

Oddly enough, my favorite color used to be blue.  Back a long time ago.  I think I switched it some time in my early teens, maybe.

Concerning sadness: I don't particularly enjoy being sad.  Not that anyone does, of course, but when I become sad, I tend to maneuver my mind to focus on something else instead.  Sitting around focusing on whatever is making you sad doesn't really help much.

That being said, one of the main things that makes me sad is something I've written about a few times on these blogs: my own shortcomings and failures.  I hate it when I'm working on something, or playing something, and make a silly mistake that I shouldn't make, or I am unable to do something I think I should be able to do.  Things that happen that cause me to doubt my own abilities, my own competence, or my own intelligence.  Especially when other people see me do it, and then I start to assume that they're now also doubting my abilities, competence, and intelligence.  It makes me sad when I fail.

Other saddening things include all the suffering in the world.  I know that I have been incredibly blessed in my life, more so than I could ever deserve, but there are many people who have been born into situations that I can't even fathom.  I find it sad when people endure terrible hardships that were not of their own making.  Mostly, I find it saddest that there are so many people completely oblivious that there is a God that loves them, or they simply reject God.  Either way, they are living their lives without a savior, whether or not they know they need one.

Ask Cooper Anything

As part of my desire to keep an active blogging life (and to counter the fact that I often have trouble coming up with topics), I've decided to see if there is anything my wide reader base (sarcasm) has any thoughts on what I should write about.  So here is your opportunity to send me questions concerning any topic you have on your mind.  I am posting this on both my personal blog, Chromiden's Chronicles, and my more serious-natured blog about life, Don't Feed the Hypocrite.  The type of question it is will determine which blog the response gets posted to.

So ask me anything - about the goings on in my life, my opinions on certain issues, general advice, my views on certain aspects of the Christian life.  Or whatever.  I'll answer pretty much anything, openly and honestly.  Feel free to post these questions as blog comments, Facebook comments, or send me a Facebook message or an email [ cooper [dot] joel [at] gmail [dot] com ].

It's quite possible that I won't get a response from this, and that's more than alright, I just thought I'd give it a try.  :)

So, It's Been Eight Months

Hi, this blog is actually not dead.  It may not be interesting, but it's not dead. 

Sadly, I don't have a major list of exciting things that have happened since my last post, but here's a little bit of a recap. 

After being laid off from Helgeson Enterprises (which has since been sold and renamed) last April, I went three and a half months being unemployed, which was absolutely fantastic.  I was able to do some house projects (previously covered in this blog), and just enjoy not having to go to work.  But, life costs money, so eventually I had to get a job.  After several interviews over the summer, I started a six month contract at Rust Consulting in Minneapolis, doing SQL database programming and development.  It's been a good job, and the people are great to work with.  I had been hoping I would be hired on full time when my contract ended in February, but instead, my contract was extended by three months.  So, it won't be too long and this contract will near an end as well.  Rust could hire me on then, or extend the contract again.  I'm also keeping my eyes open for other opportunities, especially any that are closer to home, as Rust is in downtown Minneapolis, and I have a 45 minute bus ride to work every day.  But, it's a good job, so no real complaints.

I have done a bit of work on my Reclamation card game.  It's no longer a customizable card game, but is now a card-based board game.  A lot has changed, and I'm excited to test it out, which I should be doing soon.  The game has changed enough where a different name may be needed, and I'm considering Parable of the Talents, or something to that effect.

While I failed miserably at doing this during NaNoWriMo, I am now ramping up my work on my next novel, presently titled Override.  It is different from my first two, as it is more science fiction and written in the first person.  It also may be a bit darker.  I still have a bit of outlining to do, including considering whether to write it as a standalone book or perhaps the first of a trilogy.  I am excited to keep working on it.

I submitted my fantasy novel Queen of Men to literary agents a few months ago, but got no response.  I am going to try and improve my query letter, and then send out another round of queries, including a bunch of snail mailing.  So we'll see.

I'm sure other things have happened since last July, but, that's all for now. :)

House Update: Office and Theater Room

The office

Next comes two of my favorite rooms.  The office is where I spend most of my time, as it has the computer and my cards in it, and has been decorated in a sufficiently geeky manner.  (It's really the only room in the house I have complete control over.) :)  I like Star Wars, by the way.  The office is actually the biggest bedroom in the the house, but it made the most sense as the office - it was the only one that had a cable connection in it, and we didn't see ourselves ever using it as a bedroom.  There's a bit of unused space presently.

Theater room

As soon as we saw the family room downstairs, we knew what we wanted to do with it.  Thus, the theater room was born.  In January, we purchased a 60 inch Sharp LED TV, and hung in on the wall.  We bought a Blu-Ray player a little bit later (though I only have one Blu-Ray presently: the first Hobbit movie).  We also have our Wii plugged in here (playing MarioKart on this thing is pretty great fun).  We have since then bought a love seat, and moved part of our upstairs sectional couch downstairs, as the full sectional couch did not fit into the theater room.  Megan brought her large VHS movie collection, and we put up shelves and bought a DVD shelf.  We then put up several movie posters of some of our favorite movies.  So yeah, it's a pretty great room, if I do say so myself. :)

Theater room

The office

House Update: Closet and Library

Finished closet

The next project for the house was a closet remodel.  Our bedroom is next to the "library", and we've decided that it will never need to actually be used as a bedroom.  My wife came up with the idea of basically moving the closet from that bedroom, so that it is part of our bedroom instead.  We asked Jim from Vail Builders, the same guy who did our kitchen, what the cost of the closet project would be.  He quoted us at about $3300, a bit more than we were hoping for.  Thus, I used the experience gained when helping my brother Erik finish his basement, and took on the project myself.  Since materials totaled around $300, we saved about $3000 doing it ourselves.

Finished closet

I started this project slightly after being laid off in April, so I had lots of time on my hands to complete it.  It ended up being finished over a period of about 3 weeks.  It involved a few steps - creating the opening in the bedroom wall and installing the door, and creating a frame for the library wall, and finishing that wall.  After lots of cutting, spackling, and painting, the project was complete.  Certainly things are not as clean cut, straight, and pretty as if we had paid someone to do it, and imperfections abound, but we saved a lot of money on the project.  Side note: the closet door was a double in the library, and became a single in the bedroom, due to us not wanting to move around an electrical outlet.  It certainly could have been done, and probably very easily, but alas, it worked out.

Library - after

Library - before

The new closet became my closet, and all my clothes are now there, and my bureau was moved down to the spare bedroom.  The last part of the closet project was the setup of the inside - I bought and cut down several large shelves, and cut down the pole for hanging clothes.  It can certainly handle a lot more clothes than I own, but it works pretty well for me.  We then painted the bedroom grey, with a blue accent wall.  The library was then fitted with several large bookshelves.

It was a fun project, and gives us a little more room in the bedroom, plus more wall space in the library for bookshelves.

House Update: Kitchen

After - appliance garage and pull out drawer for bins

So, the first big thing we did on the house was have some work done on the kitchen in April.  We had a contractor (Vail Builders) push back the wall in the kitchen (reducing the size of the adjacent bedroom, the library), and add in additional kitchen cabinets on each side.  One side is the pantry - lots of wide, deep shelves.  The other size includes a pull out drawer for the trash and recycling bins, and an "appliance garage", along with some extra shelving.  It was an expensive project that took about four weeks to complete, but it certainly adds a bit of space to the kitchen, and that was one of Megan's complaints about the house.  It also added room for us to open our freezer door completely.  We then painted the kitchen red.

Before

After

After 

Pantry

Been A While

The day after my last blog post, I was laid off from my programmer position at Helgeson Enterprises in White Bear Lake, Minnesota.  I had been there for 11 months.  It had been, overall, a decent job, though I wasn't sure if I was going to want to stay there for all that long anyway, though it would have been nice to have another job lined up before leaving.

Thus begun my hunt for a new job.  I have gone nearly three months without finding something, but I'm sure something will work out.  All in God's timing, though I often wish he'd hurry himself up a little bit. :) Anyway, I've had several interviews, including at TCF Bank, Goodwill/Easter Seals, Dunwoody College, and LPS.  I felt pretty good about each of those, but nothing came from it.  TCF did have me back for a second interview, though, so that was good, even if they called me the day after to tell me they were passing.

I've gone nearly three weeks without an interview now, and I admit that I've started to get a little discouraged.  Something will certainly work out, and God is in control, and I usually don't just sit around thinking about it, but I've started to lose a bit of sleep over it, waking up in the middle of the night, wide awake, unable to go back to sleep.  It's silly, really.

At least I get unemployment - only about half of my normal salary, but it's still something.  Also, having all this time off has allowed me to do a bit of work on the house.  I will be (hopefully) posting several posts in the near future, showing some of the work I've done, and talking about the work we still have to do.

Having the time off has also granted me some time to work on writing.  I am currently working on a more detailed outline for The Anarchist Chronicles trilogy, and when I am pleased with that, I will begin writing book one.  Hopefully creating a detailed three-book outline will help the overall story.

I assume I will find another job at some point, though I sometimes wonder if this is God's way of telling me that I need to change things.  Maybe I need to focus more on writing.  I'm very tempted to submit my novel Queen of Men to literary agents very soon, to see if anything comes from that.  But we will see.  Other times, I wonder if this is a good time to go back to school and get my Masters degree, but that would possibly/probably require taking out additional school loans, which I'd prefer not to do.  Ah, who knows what the future holds.

In Case You Didn't Already Know Enough

So, I've been lazy and/or uninteresting lately, thus resulting in a definite lack of blog posts, though I have added a few entries to my other online writing endeavor, Don't Feed the Hypocrite.  Over the past several weeks, I've been slowly assembling the next in my series of facts.  Here are twenty-five more, after the original sets of fifty and twenty-five.  If you don't care enough to read on, I'll understand.  No hard feelings.

1. Geographically, my favorite state is Alaska.  Basically, I love mountains.
2. I am a grammar and spelling Nazi.  Pretty much whenever I send out an email or text message, I read over it at least once to ensure it to be error-free.  It drives me crazy when I find out later that I missed an error.
3. I am not materialistic, but I do have attachments to certain physical items, like cars and places I've lived.  I still miss my first car, even though I like my current car infinitely more.  If I had the space to store them, and a wife that would allow it, I just might hunt down each of my previous cars and buy them back.
4. It would take me forever to grow a beard, if it would ever happen.  It grows slow enough that I only shave every week or two.
5. Other than chocolate and peanut butter, my two favorite types of candy are cinnamon candy (like the "Fierce Cinnamon" Hot Tomales) and sour candy (like sour gummy worms).
6. I sneeze quite loud.  My wife refers to it as "screaming while I sneeze."
7. In elementary school, I once accidentally stabbed a fellow student in the hand with a pencil.
8. I'm a decent tipper.
9. I love chocolate and peanut butter together.  Growing up, chocolate was the more important of the two, but it has recently seemed quite possible to me that I like peanut butter more than chocolate.
10. I once cheated on a test in school by writing answers on a pencil.  I've also cheated on tests by typing hints and answers into my graphing calculator.
11. I was once threatened with expulsion from high school for installing freeware imaging software on school computers (a program I was using for one of my classes).
12. I once gave a demonstrative "speech" in school where I stood in front of the class, folded a paper airplane, and then sat down, without saying a single word.  I hated speech class.  (I've always thought that I'd rather write a 20 page paper than give a 5 minute speech.)
13. Despite my terrible shyness and social anxiety, I am surprisingly adept at smalltalk with strangers.
14. I can't whistle.
15. I love spicy food.  I'd like to try a ghost pepper at some point.
16. When I was young (around 6), I peed my pants a few times during baseball games, at least once while playing catcher, leaving a puddle on or around home plate.
17. I love games.  I've pretty much never played a game or sport I didn't like.  Even if I am not good at something, and get routinely defeated at it, I always thoroughly enjoy it.  While I am very competitive and like to win, it's the experience that ultimately matters, not really the outcome.
18. When I'm driving alone, I sing loudly with the radio, with my head and arms bouncing merrily to the music.  I assume I get all sorts of odd looks from people.
19. I'm a fiddler.  Not, you know, with a musical fiddle, but I'm often fiddling with something in my hands, like a pen or pencil or whatever happens to be lying around, especially when sitting at my desk at work.  This includes a small soccer ball I sometimes roll around my desk.  I also often sit with a pen in my mouth.
20. When I was a teenager, I had a dream that my father was chasing me with a pistol, trying to kill me.  After I got married, I had a dream that I killed my wife's dog with a large fork.
21. I've been to two proms and had two girlfriends (though calling one of them a girlfriend is kind of a stretch), and never once was it because I asked the girl out.
22. I love roller coasters, but I'm not a fan of the smaller rides that just spin you around.  I once threw up after riding one.  Right at the exit gate.
23. I love to laugh, and laugh often, sometimes at things other people don't find funny, and I then have no explanation for why I found it funny.
24. I'm not really a private person.  I don't care what other people know.  This includes things like money - my salary, what I paid for my house or car, and so on.  Most people don't like to share such things, but to me, they're just numbers.
25. I'm a computer geek who owns a cell phone that was outdated when I got it 3 years ago.  It has no data plan and no touch screen.  There goes my geek cred.

The Anarchist Chronicles

As I mentioned in a previous blog entry, I have started work on my next book, revolving mainly around a certain group of invisible people mentioned in my previous work, The Second Shadow.  The new book was going to be a prequel to that book.  I am now taking another step back, and am re-imagining the whole series, where the new book would be the first book, and The Second Shadow would likely be the third, and the series as a while would be either four or five books.  I am also considering renaming the series as a whole, from The Lords of Sargoff to The Anarchist Chronicles (which is the name of a book referred to in the series - more on that later).

I am going to work on a detailed outline of the entire series, to ensure maximum consistency, and to work in more themes that are at work throughout the series.  It'll be an interesting task.  Once I finish the outline, then I will be writing book one, and likely won't finish the series yet (as it makes more sense to work on other books that could be submitted to publishers, instead of using the time to write four or five sequels to a book that isn't published yet).  Some of the work is done already, as when I had envisioned The Lords of Sargoff as a trilogy, I had gone ahead and created outlines for book two and three, and of course, The Second Shadow is already written (though it would be completely re-written).

The Anarchist Chronicles is a book written by Lord Hamrin, an evil wizard in the series, full of his thoughts and experiences.  There is currently an excerpt from the book at the start of each chapter in The Second Shadow.  Part of my outlining process is basically to write The Anarchist Chronicles in its entirety, which will both help with those chapter excerpts (as I may continue to do the same thing for the entire series), and would help with consistency and the development of Hamrin's character.

So yeah, this is my current plan.  Not sure how long the outlining process will take, as I want it to be quite detailed.  So we'll see.  But I'm excited to get moving on it.

That Really Exciting Thing I Haven't Blogged About Yet

So yeah, I've recently blogged about the advantages to having a big head.  I've listed 25 useless facts about myself.  I have, however, not even noticed the majorly exciting news that I've been looking forward to for years.  So, here goes.

The Hobbit comes out on December 14.  I am beyond excited for this movie, and the previews look fantastic.  I'll be attending a midnight showing somewhere.  This is the second of two movies this year that I was incredibly excited for (the first being The Dark Knight Rises).  That one did not disappoint, and I don't expect this one to either.  And there are two more Hobbit moves coming out.  Ah, the excitement!

Okay, so I am really excited for that movie, but... admittedly, that's actually not the purpose for this post.  Something else even more exciting is coming up.  Something most of you already probably know about, and have seen pictures of.  But, alas.

Megan and I are closing on our house on December 21.  It is up in Forest Lake, Minnesota, a little further away than we had originally been looking, but that's okay.  The area is nice, and feels a little bit less like it's near a massive city.  It's on a short little cul-de-sac street, with .97 acres, with lots of trees in the back.  The inside was completely remodeled - kitchen, bathrooms, carpet and tile.  All new appliances (though we'll need to buy a washer and dryer).  We'll have to fence a bit of the back in, to give our dog Pixel a good area to run around.  It has 5 bedrooms, which is more than we were looking for, but we're coming up with uses for them, including one which will become my office and hobby room.  It really is almost perfect for us, we think.  The only downsides are that it is a little farther away, and that the garage is detached, but those are small things.  We're super excited to close and start moving in!  We have until the end of February, when our lease is up on the apartment.  Plenty of time.

The house hunting process was interesting.  We ended up meeting our realtor a total of 6 times, visiting 23 different houses.  We had some houses we were quite excited to see, that ended up falling quite short of our expectations in real life.  And others that surprised us.  We visited 4 houses twice, and seriously considered one of them, before expanding our search to include the Forest Lake area, where we found the house we're ultimately buying.  I enjoyed looking through the different houses and seeing the different layouts, and imagining myself living in each of them.  Some of them you could disquality quickly, while others I really liked as soon as I walked in.  We went in some that were pristine, and others where there were dirty dishes stacked up in the kitchen, and Playboy magazines sitting on shelves.  At the start, I had hopes that we'd only look at a few houses before making a decision, but that ended up not happening, which is quite alright, as I think we're ending up with a really nice house at a good price ($185,000).  That, combined with our down payment, and we should be able to pay it off within 15 years (that's the hope, anyway, but only time will tell).

The First Step is Acceptance

In response to my short sister-in-law, I have come up with the top 10 advantages to having a big head.  Not that this applies to me. 

Oh, I can't hide from this fact.  I can't really hide from anything with a head of this size.  So, without further delay, here is the list. 

10. On a sunny day, it can provide shade to large groups of people.
9. Big forehead means lots of advertising space.
8. Eavesdropping is easier, as your ears are naturally closer to the eavesdropping targets.
7. With a good paint job, a big head can play a boulder in the school play.
6. A big head has a big mouth, allowing that person to eat more food.
5. People think you have a big brain.  Even if you don't.
4. A big headed person's hat can double as a tent.
3. It protects the rest of your body from rain.
2. It allows your entire body to double as a battering ram.
1. In a fight (including a zombie apocalypse), the headbutt is a lethal move.

Twenty-Five Facts

I had previously done a list of 50 facts about me and my life.  Here are 25 more.

Fascinating!

1. I strongly believe that the most important part of a cake is the frosting.
2. I am not a germophobe.  I'll drink from someone else's glass and not worry for a moment.  Germs happen.
3. I may not seem like one, but I'm a hugger.  My shyness limits this, but if anyone wants a hug, my arms are open.
4. I'm not a big fan of gum.  To me, it loses its flavor within five minutes, then you are just chewing a piece of rubber.
5. My stomach doesn't care what time of day it is.  I like breakfast foods for lunch and supper, and normal meal foods for breakfast.  This includes dessert.  Food is food.
6. The sight of vomit makes me queasy.
7. I have a natural frown.  This sometimes causes people to think I'm sad or angry when I'm not.  And I'm almost always not.
8. I used to firmly believe that I would never get married.  I was going to have four cats.  Instead, I now have a wife and a dog.  If my wife would allow it, I would likely get a good sized snake, and a tarantula.
9. When I, uh, "pass gas," I always say "Excuse me."  Even if no one else is around.
10. I have weird issues with social anxiety.  Sometimes, when I need to go talk to someone at work, or make a phone call, I sit for several minutes readying myself for the encounter.  If it's a phone call, I sometimes write up what I'm going to say first, so I can read it when I call.
11. Back in the day, I seriously considered going to college for an English degree instead of computers.   Now I sometimes wonder if that would have been the better choice.
12. I would probably go back to school for a Masters if it wasn't so ridiculously expensive, and if I did, I think I'd be pretty excited about school.
13. Due to being pigeon-toed, when I was younger, I would often trip over my own feet.  It took quite a bit of conscious practice on how I walked to make that stop happening.
14. I can't put my tongue into the normal U-shape that most people can.  I can, however, flip my tongue upside-down.  So that's something.
15. I have trouble reading a book while there is talking around me.  This includes the TV.  It also affects me when I'm trying to concentrate on a project at work.
16. I don't like coffee or tea, though I am slowly warming up to some cappuccino and mocha flavors.
17. I'm not really a fan of eating eggs.  Ketchup helps.
18. If it wasn't highly dangerous and illegal, I think it would be great fun to be in a high speed police chase.
19. To me, age is just a number.  It had no impact on me to turn 30.  It won't bother me to turn 40 or 50, and so on.  I'm not afraid to get old.  I don't believe that I will be having a mid-life crisis.
20. I have a non-completely-serious belief that people who are close to me have some extra protection in life, as nothing that catastrophically terrible has ever happened to someone close to me, and no one that close to me has ever died.  If I were to rank the saddest I've ever been about the death of someone in my life, the top two would be cats.
21. I like change.  This is referring to when some aspect of life changes, not the money you find between the couch cushions (though that is good too).  Before getting married, I would rearrange my room on a fairly regular basis, putting furniture sometimes in a non-conventional setup (TV in the closet).  Variety is good.
22. When I was young, I hated mowing the lawn, and thought I would likely buy a condo someday instead of house, so I wouldn't have to deal with yard work.  I even joked about instead buying a house, but covering the yard with artificial turf.  Now I'm super excited for a house with a yard, and excited to buy a lawn mower.
23. I sometimes think I would be a pretty good voice actor.  I do a decent imitation of Smeagol, and Heath Ledger's Joker (the laugh, at least).  And other odd voices of my own creation.
24. I'm optimist.  Some people would say that I'm naively optimistic.  But I just don't think life is really ever as bad as we think it is.  I think humans like to overreact and feel bad for themselves.  Plus, I believe that God is in control of every situation, and thus, things are never hopeless.
25. I only get my hair cut once every few months, when I'm in danger of having hair that is classified as a mullet.  I just don't care enough about such things to do it more than that.  Of course, my wife will sometimes tell me that she thinks the time has come, and then I go in.

A Prequel

I've been pondering for a while what to write next, and I've had several ideas.  One was set in the future, and involved underground mines.  Another was a fantasy story involving a smuggler.  I even thought about doing some revisionist historical fantasy, setting a fantasy story in the middle of the Civil War.  While I have vaulted these ideas and will consider them later, they are not what I think will be my next project.

In The Second Shadow, the first book I wrote, there are a group of people known as abscondytas.  They're basically human, but invisible to human eyes.  They have a few chapters in that book, where part of their backstory is explained, but I've (probably) decided to write a book that goes into more detail about them.  Thus, this book would take place about 150 years before the events of The Second Shadow.  It's a prequel of sorts, I suppose.

This would be meant as a stand alone book, so you would not need to have read The Second Shadow to know what's going on.  This is especially true, since once I have written it (and edited in one million times), I will be trying to get it published, while (I assume) The Second Shadow will not yet be published.

I've just started the process.  I've been working on the outline, and am forcing myself to spend a bit more time on the outline than I have in the past.  The initial writing on a manuscript is my favorite part of the writing process, so I'm excited to get there.  However, I want to get my outline to be rather detailed first, and I'm also going to detail the characters and their personalities more before I start the actual writing.  In theory, from The Second Shadow to Queen of Men, my writing as improved, which includes a more detailed planning process.  Progress on this should speed up immensely once my extra election-cycle work is over.

The Bucket List

At some point, I made a short bucket list.  Just five items, and only one of which is all that important.  I'd meant to post it before, but now seems like a good time, as I'm about to check off one of the items.  Only four more to go.

So, here is my bucket list in its current form.  I can, of course, add to this in the future.  These are in no particular order.

Go to a San Francisco 49ers game.  The 49ers have been my favorite sports team my whole life, even though I'd never seen them play.  I haven't been to San Francisco.  I haven't even been to California.  But, I grew up in the 80's watching Joe Montana win Super Bowls, and I've been a faithful fan ever since.  Not only have they had a resurgence the last couple years - ESPN.com currently has them ranked #1 in the league in their power rankings - but I finally get to see them play this coming Sunday, when they come to play the Vikings at the Metrodome.  I'm really rather excited, even though we'll be up in the nosebleed seats.  I'll be wearing my 49ers shirt and rooting on my team.  (This is one of only two times I would root against the Vikings - the other is when they play the Patriots.)  So this bucket list item will be checked off in two days.  Go Niners!

Publish a book.  This is really the most important item on this list.  In theory, I could publish a book at any time by going the self-publishing route, but I really want to get a traditional publisher.  I hope, if I keep writing and finishing a book every year or two, that eventually I'll get a publisher's attention.  I guess we'll see.  Eventually, though, if years go by with no publisher, I may self-publish something.

Catch a foul ball or a homerun at a baseball game.  I've come close at some Twins games, and other games, but never gotten one.  I need to start going to more baseball games (I didn't make it to a single Twins game this year).

Hit a home run.  I play on a softball team during the summer and fall, and played baseball growing up.  I've hit in-the-park home runs, but never hit one over the fence.  I've come close, but not quite.  Eventually, it's got to happen.  Time to hit the batting cages.

Make it to all 50 states.  This one takes a little more of a commitment.  I've currently been to 39 of the 50 states (missing Hawaii, Oregon, California, Rhode Island, Idaho, Oklahoma, Mississippi, Louisiana, Georgia, South Carolina, North Dakota).  Some of them will be easy.  I'll get out to California at some point to visit my brother.  North Dakota is only four hours away.  A southeastern United States road trip would take care of a good chunk of them.  Others (Rhode Island) will be tougher.

The Mountain, Explained

Sometimes when I write things, I don't know if it comes across the way I mean it to.  I wonder if people just think I'm nuts (rightfully so, of course).  So, I decided to write up an explanation of the meaning behind the short story I recently posted.  So, here goes.

The story is basically about sin.  Sin is something that can creep in and control us, without us even knowing it.  And it doesn't just take over in an instant; it takes time.  It takes steps, gaining footholds where it can.  It's a Slow Fade.  In the story, the man has a nice, pleasant existence on the prairie, until sand starts to build up around his house.  The sand is meant to symbolize sin.  It grows and overtakes us, and we often fight against it, even though we're usually the reason behind it.  We build our house up to try and escape it, but it catches up with us.  We exert so much energy running from our sin, instead of confronting it.  Soon the sin covers us, and there is not even a hint of our former life.  There is just the sin.

The sand represents the sin we bring on ourselves, for it was the man himself to piled it up.  The creatures in the prairie are meant to symbolize the world, and how it (and Satan) attack our weaknesses.  The house and his crops represent our lives, for sin and the world comes and buries it, and destroys it.  And, of course, the warrior represents Christ, who comes to save us from ourselves, despite the mess we've made.  He gave his life for us, and yet he is not subject to death, for he is still alive.

So, yeah.  There's that.

I'll try to have a new post soon, talking about my new project - novel #3.

The Mountain

Here's something I haven't done for a while - written a short story.  Forgive me if this one makes no sense, which it might not.  If if it doesn't, I'm sure I can say that I was tired when I wrote it, and blame it on that.  Yeah.  I'm sure it can use some more work, but I decided to post it anyway. :)  It's 2775 words.

-- 
The Mountain  

I have a good life.  It’s nothing extraordinary, but nothing terrible.  It is at it should be, and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
I have a small house on the prairie, at the crest of a small and barely noticeable hill.  The field is heavily populated with crops of a wide sort that I have planted myself, for that is what I do.  Other than crops, there are groupings of trees and grass that comes up to my waist.
The house I call home is simple and sufficient, unadorned with relics, as are the homesteads of those living in the nearby cities.  It is small but more than enough, for I am just one man, a simple man with simple tastes.  Much of my time is spent in the fields, as this is how I put food on my table and earn money enough to keep what I have.  The work is not overly strenuous.  The land is fertile and the harvests are always plentiful, and I never lack.
It has been a normal, quaint existence for many years, with no great disruptions, just as a like it.  Today is no different.  I awake early and ready myself for the day, for there is much work to be done in the fields.  My cupboards are nearly empty, and the crops are awaiting my scythe.  Each morning, I walk out of my house and look upon the sunrise, as it signals the beginning of a new day.  I proudly survey my land and the work I’ve done, yet this day, as I opened my door, I could not see my land.  I saw only dirt.
A great mound had sprouted up overnight, it seems.  I follow it around, seeing that it completely encircles my house.  I stare at it for some time, not knowing where it had come from, or who had decided to pile it up around my home.  Not knowing what to think, I climb and stand upon it, looking down upon the prairie.  There, some distance from the house, was something else new.  A trench now also encircled the house and farmland, and I know it to be the source of the dirt that is now piled up beneath me, yet it is still unknown who had done this, or why they would desire to do such a thing.  It is really quite bizarre, and rather infuriating.
However, I have no time for such rage.  I want to remove the dirt, returning it to the trench, yet I have no time for such things, as there is much to do.  Errands to run, crops to harvest, and other responsibilities to consider, so the task of the dirt is pushed to another day.
The next day comes, and the dirt mound has grown even more, now standing at a height above the roof of his house.  I now let my anger overpower my calm, cursing the men who have done this.  I shake my fist at the cities in the distance, knowing it to be them who have done this to me.  The lord of the greatest of the cities has often sent out notices to the residents of the land, suggesting they abandon their homes and come live within his city.  Yet why would I leave my house, and the life I love and enjoy?  I have not asked for his help, nor do I desire it.
The trench has also grown wider and deeper.  However, I’m still unable to find the time to remove the dirt, for I can not forsake my other duties.  While my work may be easy, it is time consuming and can not be overlooked.
Day after day, the dirt piles up higher and wider.  One morning, after climbing over the mound and walking to the trench, I look to see that it is now not merely a circle, for a new trench has been dug as a great river, from the trench to the nearby sea, and now the trench is full of water.  At last, I must choose to neglect my other duties, and I cut down a tree of the prairie and construct a bridge over the trench.  By the time I finish, the sun has set, and I return to my house for the evening, and my mood is as dark as the night.
The next morning, I climb over the ever-growing mound and look down upon the trench, and the bridge is no longer in place, but is instead floating in the trench, disconnected from its edges, for the trench has grown wider in the night.  I again curse the cities and the cruelty of the men.  I curse the lord of the great city and his offers for help, for surely they see me now, and yet their assistance is nowhere to be seen.  Perhaps it was even the king’s men who piled the dirt around my home.  I wouldn’t doubt it, those traitorous devils.
I then look into the water and see things there I have never before believed in, for great scales were sliding over the surface.  Large creatures were swimming within the trench, lifting their horned heads from the water, and peering up at me with hungered eyes.  I step back in fear, and for the first time I feel something I have never felt upon the prairie.  I feel trapped.
The dirt has grown wider still, and there is now no room between the edge of the mound and the house.  I realize the truth of things, for at the current rate, the house will soon be swallowed whole.  I chop down another tree and build on a new level to the house.  I finished the work and return inside for the night, wanting to forget what I had seen, hoping to wake up in the morning and find it was all a dream.
If only I could be so lucky.  I wake to find the first level of the house has been lost to the dirt, so I crawl out of the window of the newly-built second level, chop down another tree, and build on another level.  This continues, as every few days, the mount grows enough to engulf the highest level, and I add another above it.  For many days, I call out curses to the city and the lord there, blaming them for the hardships that I am enduring, yet I soon come to no longer question it.  It has simply become part of my life.
One day, as I am building the next level, I hear voices on the wind, and there on the other side of the trench are several people yelling up at me.  Mockers, I know it, for they are likely the same people doing this to me.  I hate them for it, hoping the great creatures of the trench would leap out and swallow them whole.
Then one morning comes that is unlike the others, for I look out a high window to see only dirt.  I push through the dirt with a shovel, and soon I see sunlight.  I reach out my neck to look down the side of the hill, too far, and I fall from the window and roll down the mound, twisting and turning as I go.  I eventually stop and lay there for a moment, feeling pain around the whole of my body.  It did not seem to be new, but a pain that had been there for some time, yet I have never noticed it before.  In time, I stand and brush the sand off my clothes.  I look up to see that the mound has become a mountain, and it completely covers the house, and no trace of it remains, other than the hole I had dug myself.
Behind me comes a growl, deep and terrifying, and I turn to see a great lizard, scaled in green and horned from head to tail.  It charges at me and I fall backward with fear, landing on my shovel.  I pick it up and swing it at the oncoming creature, striking it across its fanged jaw, and the creature steps back and groans.  I then drop the shovel and turn, quickly climbing up the mountain, leaping to reach and pull myself into the window of the house.  I turn and look down upon the field, and there I see not just the one creature, but many, dozens upon dozens of them, stepping out from behind trees and scampering toward the house, though they appear unable to crawl up the steep mound.
I sigh, thankful for the safety of my home.  Yet from behind comes a hiss, and I turn to see a brood of snakes upon the floor, slithering toward me.  One comes close and I crush its head beneath my boot, and several others come forward.  I reach to the side and grab my hatchet, yet I know I can not kill them all before one sinks its fangs into my skin, releasing its venom.  I turn to the window and dive out it, being careful not to roll as far down the hill.  The beasts see me and charge, yet I somehow work my way up the mound and out of their reach.  I stand at the peak of the hill, surveying all that is around me, for it is no longer the plain that I had known for so long.  Instead, it is now a barren wasteland.  The crops and trees all about the land are withering and dying.  Was it not so recently that this land was full of life?  Yet I can barely remember it, for it seems so long ago that I was a simple farmer with an enviable life.  Scores of great lizards cover the land, crushing the fruits of my labor beneath their large feet.  There, near the trench, is the greatest of them, a massive, winged beast.  All around it are other such creatures, though smaller.  At once, the smaller ones lift from the ground and fly toward the mountain.
I close my eyes and cry, for I know the end is coming swiftly.  I can no longer evade the creatures.  They will reach me and sink their fangs into my skin, and then I will be no more.  I can do nothing now but howl in pain, wondering what I may have done to deserve such a fate, but there is no time for questions.  There is only time for death.  The greatest of the beast then cries out in an angry roar, and all the other beasts, winged and otherwise, turn and rush toward him.  There, on the inner edge of the trench, is a warrior, dressed in great armor.  Behind him, the bodies of several beasts of the sea float belly-up in the trench.
The warrior rushes toward the mound, swinging his great silver sword from side to side, slaying all beasts that came close.  Soon, the warrior reaches the mountain, leaving a trail of dead creatures behind him.  He scales the mound with ease, then looks down upon me with pity in his eyes.
“Come, follow me,” the warrior says, his voice bold, “for I will lead you to safety.”
I don’t move.  Doubt fills my mind, for who could this man be, and how can he save me from such beasts?  He is a fool, I believe, and yet there is something more about him.  He has made it this far, at least, through the trench and the fields.  I look down to the fields and the see the winged beasts coming closer, and I know my death is at hand, and despite my longing to stay upon the mountain, I stand and follow the warrior down the hill, stumbling as I go.  The warrior’s sword flashes before him, and creatures fall quickly, as though they are no match for his blade, even with greater numbers.  Soon we are at the trench.  I stare into the waters, and the eyes of great creatures of the sea stare back, and my body freezes. 
“Jump in and swim with me, and I will protect you,” the warrior says, and the head of a great beast comes out of the water and stares up at us.  “I can protect you, yet I cannot force you to follow.  You must choose to dive in yourself.”
I turn to see more beasts approaching, and then the greatest of the beasts lands before me, quaking the ground beneath my feet.  It snarls and then breathes a great breath of flame toward me, and instinctively I turn and jump into the water, with the warrior splashing in beside me.  I open my eyes beneath the surface of the water and look upon great beasts swimming toward us, yet the warrior reaches out his blade within the waters and slays them.  Who is this man, with such power, I wonder as I swim frantically across the trench.  I reach the other side and climb out, only to see the great beast reach his long neck into the water and grab the warrior, pulling him back to the inside of the trench, hurling him into the field.  The beast rears back and breathes a great fire over the prairie, and soon the crops and the warrior are charred.  My heart drops in my chest, knowing this man has sacrificed his life to save mine.  I long to jump back in the water and swim toward the great beast, allowing him to serve me the same fate, for why do I deserve to still live?
The beast then looks at me, and starts to breath a great fire toward me, but I am pulled from behind, and the flames shoot past me.  A group of people yell at me to follow.  I look back at the corpse of the warrior, still smoking from the fire, and the tears pour down my face.  Despite my desire at that moment to die, I follow the group into a small town.
A couple days pass, yet the pain is still to fresh.  I am allowed to stay at an inn in town, and I do not want to come out and face the light.  I soon come to realize, however, that the warrior would not want me to feel such things.  He has given his life for mine, and to throw it away is to be insulting to his sacrifice.  So I stand and walk out of the room, and the light hits me hard.  My eyes adjust, and then I see something more surprising, so surprising that I run at it, for the warrior is walking toward the gate.  A voice from the side stops me in my tracks.
“What happened to you has happened to all of us,” a woman said sternly.  She stood there peacefully.  “It’s happening to everyone else out there as well,” she continued, nodding towards the warrior as he disappeared through the gate.  “There are always more to save.”
I don’t know what to think in response.  “How do you know what happened to me?” I ask.  “I haven’t talked to anyone here.”
“Do you think that dirt piled up on its own?” she says, approaching me.  “No, my good man, it was you who made the mountain, whether in your sleep or without a memory.  For we, here, watched as you built up your mountain during the night, then built up your house during the day.  At first it was just you, but then there were others that joined you, evil men of the prairie.   It would not be long before you could no longer keep up with the mountain, and it would overtake you.  There are great terrors of the world that do not show their face unless they think the moment is opportune.  The creatures flocked to you once they saw your vulnerability.  And, before you ask, it is not fully known to us how the Lord of this city does what he does, for he is not bound to flesh and blood like we are.  He is what he is, and it is because of that truth that we are now what we are.  Those that choose to follow him can live safely with him here.  Those that reject him are lost to the darkness that threatened to overtake you.  Yet he does not do this work alone, for those he saves, those who are truly grateful, give of themselves in return.”
I smile.  “I am grateful.”
The woman nods.  “Come now, the Lord of this city has work to be done.”